As Humans, it’s nearly impossible to not “judge a book by its cover.” Its natural; it’s how we perceive, recognize, stereotype, and categorize each other as humans. As time goes on the cover is no longer important and the substance, the pages, that which makes up a person is discovered, understood, and really and fully grasped.
I feel as though I am always judged. Growing up I was awkward, shy, small, a loner with no social skills, who had no life outside family, a few friends, playing outside 30 minutes a day and watching one show per day. I lived this way - introverted, calm, shy - with extremely low self esteem. I only started gaining confidence and really stepping out of this Indian shell I was trapped in until last semester of senior year of high school. It was only at this point, once I began working out, joking with other students and teachers, being friendly with everyone, interacting with girls and making new friends, that I really began evolving into the person that I am today.
Today I am the opposite. I have since matured and grown physically and mentally. I felt like I’ve seen it all at 24; the heartbreak, financial problems, loss of loved ones, professional and social experiences, women. Don’t get me wrong I’m still constantly learning and have a long way to go.
One of my focuses in 2012 is learning about myself. And one of the subjects of personal study I believe has recently culminated in a now friend disliking and actually even using the word “hate” to describer how she previously felt of me. Now I’m not sure as to why this may be; everyone has the right to make judgments and perceive others based on their own sources of information be it themselves or others. I’ve experienced these sort of situations before in different contexts. Other females, ex-girlfriends, friends of friends who have assumed that I’m perhaps a player, a financial exec just looking to make money, a douche, a fratboy who hasnt changed, an egotistical bodybuilder, perhaps someone who cares about himself and having a good time than others.
But I’m the opposite…I genuinely care for others around me. I’ve made mistakes in the past but the past is the past. I’ve been immature and have broken hearts. I’ve lied, i’ve cheated, I’ve stole. But those days are behind me. College is gone and I have moved on to the next chapter of my life. I am self confident, but as you know there’s a fine line between confidence and cockiness. I believe in myself as well as those I roll with. I am sympathetic and empathetic by nature and can connect emotionally with all of my friends; I feel their pain when they are in pain, their anxiousness when they’re anxious, their happiness when they’re happy. I believe in Myself and What I Do.
I seek to understand myself, to develop into the person and business person I aim to be. I will generate well being for all those around me and be successful. I will never forget my roots and support all my friends and family along my journey and once I’ve made it, support them then as well. I will do my part to support philanthropies, service, and the community at large.
I cant control others perception of myself nor will I change to accommodate others’ judgments. I can do only Me and I know why I’m here. I’m just here to Live - to appreciate the short time I’ve been given on this Earth, to Laugh, to have Fun, be Loud, be Weird, and to Love Everyone around Me and the Time that I am blessed and able to spend with Them.